DAYS

GOIN' FISHIN', JUST LIKE GEORGE!
Ok, so I'm not going fishing, but I am going to be away for the next week or so. Like our dear leader, I too need to rest up so I can make "good, crisp decisions." Hell, if I follow his regimen, I just may manage to snub a grieving mother, ignore the entire nation and piss off the whole of the world. But I only have one week to his five, so maybe I'll have to skip the 'pissing off the whole world' part. We'll see.

Fishin' for that 'noble cause'.

I know my posts lately have been a little angry, what with all the hate and all. So I thought I'd leave you all with a few lighter items to get you through the rest of August. Enjoy.

• Calvin is Jack. Hobbes is Tyler. Discuss.
• Karl Rove has met his match. Meet Harlan McCraney.
• Bob Odenkirk: LINDSEY LOHAN AND YELLOBRIBBONS! SUPPORT!
• Pickin' on hillbillies. (oh, why not?) Don't worry, the South Will Rise Again.
• I just can't figure out why America is becoming so obese... it's weird, isn't it? Hey, anyone up for a Boston Cream Cheeseburger? Mmmmm, tasty.
• Prepare to be really, really offended: Cartman the Aristocrat.
• Speaking of people who offend, have I ever expressed my undying love for Sarah Silverman? Well, my love? It's undying. First, watch her roast Pamela Anderson. Then, watch the trailer to her forthcoming movie Jesus Is Magic. That bitch rocks.
• And speaking of Jesus, there's been a lot of talk lately about Intelligent Design vs. Evolution, but how come nobody seems to be talking about the Theory of the Flying Spaghetti Monster? No respect.
• We need a change in this country, and Christopher Walken is the man to deliver it. Hey, more cowbell? I'm all for that. Besides, the man can dance.
• Are your neurons bursting with memetic viruses? Find out with the Human Virus Scanner.
• You've seen it before, but you can never have too many badgers. Can you?
• Lastly, who brought the nearsighted kid to the pool??

Enjoy the dog days everyone. See you in September.