DAYS

OF SCOOTERS & BIG DICKS
Ever since the Rove story began picking up steam, I've had this niggling fear. You see, Karl Rove scares me. Always has, probably always will. Hey, stop laughing... I don't think I'm alone in my fear, the guy's like Dr. Evil without the sharks. Or maybe he does have sharks... sharks that actually do have frickin' laser beams on their heads.



But really, this entire time I've worried that Rove has something up his big fat evil sleeve. He's just too damn smart to let something like this happen. I've thought, 'What if this is just one, big master distraction? What if this is just something to take the focus off the chaos in Iraq, the Downing Street Memo, or a host of other problems and scandals that continue to plague this administration?' But that doesn't make sense because all the problems in Iraq and questions about the march to war are directly tied to this leak probe. Don't forget that by the way.

So why would Rove do what he did? Why would he leave himself so open? What dastardly trap is he setting for us all? This weekend, I think some answers to those questions began to take shape, and they have everything to do with a guy named Scooter. Yes, that's right, Scooter.

Does this look like a face you can trust??

Lewis "Scooter" Libby is Dick Cheney's Chief-of-Staff, sometimes referred to as "the guy behind the guy behind the guy". Matt Cooper from TIME Magazine confirmed yesterday that Scooter was indeed among his White House sources who had tipped him off to Plame's role within the CIA. Meanwhile, conservative "journalist" Robert Novak (aka douchebag, aka Republican shill) has said he had 2 high-level administration sources he spoke with about Plame. We know Rove was one, who was the other? I'm thinking Scooter. Rove also claims that he learned about Plame from Novak, but who did Novak learn about Plame from? Again, I'm thinking Scooter. Lastly, Rove's lawyer, Robert Luskin, has been adament that his client "is not a target of the investigation." Well, then, who is? Again, Scooter comes to mind. And do you think Scooter does anything without Big Dick knowing about it? Somehow I doubt it.

So could it be possible that Karl Rove has been taking the heat so Cheney won't have to? Maybe we shouldn't be sucked in by the 'Get Rove' obsession and instead begin beating the drums to 'Get Dick'? (yeah, I said 'beat' and 'get dick' in the same sentence, have a field day Wonkette) Maybe I left the flaming poo on the wrong doorstep this weekend.

And Bush? Yeah, he didn't know a damn thing. The guy probably still giggles when he even hears the word "leak." Although, maybe the release of these photos less than a month before the Novak piece hit in the summer of 2003 was more than just another bumble by our bumblefuck president? He is after all riding (falling off) a 'Scooter.'



Hmmmmmmmmmm.

MORE
Time: 'What I Told the Grand Jury', by Matthew Cooper
AmProg: Who is Scooter Libby?
BBC: Bush Fails the Segway Test
Fineman: Rove at War
Rocketboom: Drinking With Scotty