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Thursday, October 06, 2005

STAY THE COURSE OF COURSE
Image hosted by TinyPic.com 'Stick with me, I've got lots of flags.'

President Bush gave a "major speech" this morning to outline his strategery for winning the global struggle on terror. A few highlights:

"We will never back down, never give in, and never accept anything less than complete victory."
Uh, hey, remember this? Bush: 'U.S. Can't Win War On Terror.' Frickin' Flip Flopper.

"Today there are more than 80 Iraqi army battalions fighting the insurgency alongside our forces. Progress isn't easy, but it is steady."
Progress in the Bush administration apparently means going from 100 ready-to-fight batallions to 80 in the course of a week. And from three batallions able to fight on their own to one.

"A federal constitutional system respects the rights and religious traditions of all citizens, while giving all minorities, including the Sunnis, a stake and a voice in the future of their country."
Yes, all minorities. Except for the homos. They don't count.

"We're determined to deny radical groups the support and sanctuary of outlaw regimes. State sponsors like Syria and Iran have a long history of collaboration with terrorists, and they deserve no patience from the victims of terror."
Uh oh. He's still thinking about it.

"In truth, they have endless ambitions of imperial domination and they wish to make everyone powerless except themselves…They seek to end dissent in every form and to control every aspect of life and to rule the soul itself."
Ummmm, is he talking about terrorists or The Republican Party?

"Islamic radicalism is elitist, led by a self-appointed vanguard that presumes to speak for the Muslim masses. Bin Laden says his own role is to tell Muslims, quote, "what is good for them and what is not." And what this man, who grew up in wealth and privilege, considers good for poor Muslims is that they become killers and suicide bombers. He assures them that this is the road to paradise, though he never offers to go along for the ride."
Wow. Did he seriously say that?? Hold on, let's try something here:

"Neoconservatism is elitist, led by a self-appointed vanguard that presumes to speak for the American people. Bush says his own role is to tell Americans, quote, "what is good for them and what is not." And what Bush, who grew up in wealth and privilege, considers good for poor Americans is that they become killers. He assures them that this is the road to paradise, though he never offers to go along for the ride."
Thought so. Man, this is just getting too easy.

As ridiculous and rehashed as most of these assertions are, there's no need to worry. After all, he's only saying what God told him to. And really, who's gonna question God? Pbbbbbbt.

Comments:
Thanks! I was going to post that but you saved me the time. Watching that speech was hilarious, if it weren't for all the dead. I told hubby that everytime Bush spoke of the terrorists or OBL, he could just insert his own name. I loved the "wealth, priviledge but OBL never offers to go along for the ride." Uhhhh, Shrub, where were you when OBL and the Taliban ran the Soviet Union out of Afghanistan? You know, the long ride he took while a CIA asset? Were you doing coke and dodging your guard duty? Just wondering.
 
Now I seriously can't wait for what you have to say about the big bird-flip the Nobel Committee just gave Bush by giving the peace prize to ElBaradei.

Too funny. Too wonderful. I can barely contain myself.

PS: The "Stick with me, i've got lots of flags" caption caused me to laugh outloud while sitting in my boss' office pretending to take dictation. If he had taken notice, I could have shown him "Days", I suppose, as he is the one super wealthy guy I know who made huge efforts to get Kerry elected.

Yeah, that worked out well.
 
Ahhh Marie, so sorry about the laughter outburst in front of your boss... you take dictation for him? You know, if he were president, that may be enough to qualify you for a Supreme Court nomination.

Oh, and related to the flag caption, if you've never seen Eddie Izzard's 'flag' bit, check it out. I believe there's a link to part of it under the 'See' category on the right, but see the whole thing if you can. Hilarious.

Lastly, about ElBaradei, I'm sure the BushCo. reaction will be something along the lines of, "Peace Prize? Crap that, Peace is for pussies!" Don't 'cha think?
 
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