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Thursday, August 19, 2004

ON THE TRAIL: Attack edition
Vietnam or Iraq: Which is the Bigger Issue?
Amazingly, this Bitter Swift Boat Veterans for Payback thing just continues to spin on. Today, John Kerry finally fired back at his attackers. In a speech this morning to a firefighters group in Boston, Kerry accused the Bush campaign of allowing GOP-funded groups like Swift Boat Veterans for Truth to do Bush's "dirty work." He said, "the president keeps telling people he would never question my service to our country. Instead, he watches as a Republican-funded attack group does just that. Well, if he wants to have a debate about our service in Vietnam, here is my answer: 'Bring it on."

It's about time. I was getting really sick of the Kerry campaign standing idly by while these groups questioned his service record. It's ridiculous that this is even an issue in this election. Just remember, whatever the details of his time in Vietnam are, the facts are this: While Kerry was dodging bullets in Vietnam, Bush was dodging the draft in Texas... or Alabama... or wherever the hell he was. If Bush hadn't been so drunk on Schlitz, he'd probably remember where he was. Kerry served. Bush didn't. End of story.

Earlier this week, the anti-Bush group MoveOn released an ad criticizing Bush for using his family connections to avoid service in Vietnam. Once again, the enigma that is John McCain stepped forward to call on Kerry to condemn the ad, which Kerry did immediately when he said, "I agree with Senator McCain that the ad is inappropriate. This should be a campaign of issues, not insults." So there you go, immediate condemnation. And just for the record, Bush still has not heeded McCain's call from weeks ago to specifically condemn the Swift Boat ads.

McCain had the most salient quote in regard to this entire issue when he said, "I wish we would stop opening wounds from a war of more than 30 years ago and talk about the war we're fighting now." I couldn't agree more, but then McCain also said, "This is the bitterest, most unsavory campaign in the nation's history - and it's only going to get worse." ... and you know what that means? More juicy blog material for me! Sweet! Keep the dirt flying! I'm conflicted.

Mon Cherie, John Kerry
Speaking of things we shouldn't be focused on, in a GQ interview John Kerry revealed what he finds attractive in a woman. "A full woman. Confident. A woman who loves being a woman. Who wears her womanhood. Who knows how to flirt and have fun. Smart. Confident. Has a sense of self. Strong. And obviously sexy and saucy and challenging." Besides his own wife Teresa, Kerry said in the interview that he finds Charlize Theron, Catherine Zeta-Jones and Marilyn Monroe to be extremely sexy. Or, as AOL's online news report put it, "Kerry fingers sexy celebrities." Come on AOL, nobody noticed that??

But the New York Daily News dug deeper to find Lee Whitnum, a former lover (and aspiring novelist, natch) of Kerry's who claims that the senator "would whisper French phrases in my ear. I would say, 'Speak to me in French!' and so he'd do it." Damn you Whitnum, you know the Republicans will use that!

John Kerry = Big Pussy
In a speech last week, vice president Dick "go fuck yourself" Cheney needled John Kerry for saying he would fight a more "sensitive" war on terror. This is yet further evidence that the Bush team intends to turn this campaign into a battle of who has the bigger balls. Taken in context, Kerry's comment reflects a thoughtful alternative to the Bush approach to the self-declared "War on Terror." Here's Kerry's full quote:
"I believe I can fight a more effective, more thoughtful, more strategic, more proactive, more sensitive war on terror that reaches out to other nations and brings them to our side."
Cheney of course only wants people to hear the "sensitive" comment, attempting to make it seem as though John Kerry would fight terrorists with an offer of flowers and candy. Of course, that's not what Kerry meant. But Cheney is right, the Bush administration isn't fighting a sensitive war, they are fighting an ineffective, thoughtless, strategy-less, reactive war that ignores the rest of the world and spits in the eye of its detractors. And that seems to be working sooooo well.

Democratic senator Tom Harkin responded to Cheney's attacks thusly: "When I hear this coming from Dick Cheney, who was a coward, who would not serve during the Vietnam War, it makes my blood boil. He'll be tough, but he'll be tough with someone else's kid's blood."

Who's the pussy? Dick Cheney, who used five deferments to avoid service in Vietnam because he had "other priorties," is.

Bring it on indeed.

Fuck it, I'm voting for Barbie.

Fear of Death = Bush
Think the terror warnings sowing fear in the hearts of Americans have no political impact? Read this.

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